what a third grade holiday celebration can teach us about connecting with clients

The other day, I attended my son’s holiday celebration in his third-grade classroom. To capture the true spirit and meaning of the season, the kids took turns standing up in pairs and reading narratives about one another.

These weren’t fill-in-the-blank recitations. They were insightful and moving reflections. With their teacher’s guidance, the kids had taken the time to see and chronicle the world through their classmates’ eyes. This, of course, left nary a dry eye among us parents.

In my last post, I suggested that lawyers can benefit from seeing matters through our clients’ eyes. This requires us to set our own preconceptions aside. As John Baldoni notes in his recent post at (the just-revamped) Harvard Business Review, it also requires us to keep our egos in check.

Adding to the conversation, Seth Godin comments that gaining and keeping this other-focus can be tough when we’re so used to trying to get people to see things our way. (Lawyers are, after all, in the persuasion business.)

But, it can be done.

Pamela Slim offers us some pointers in a recent post on creating a client-centered, natural business model. Like Kathie Conway of Brains on Fire, you might also find that sharing personal stories is a direct route to learning about the people we work with and want to work with.

On the flip side, some suggest that you can’t really know others if you don’t have a strong sense of who you are. Those in need of some guided self-reflection can start with Seth Godin’s engaging 8 questions and a why.

consuming bad news: a new spin on you are what you eat

Even though there’s been a bit more encouraging news about the state of the economy, the media (mainstream and otherwise) still inundates us with story after story of global, national, local, professional and personal crises in the face of the financial undertow. Even my 8-year-old - who’s mood largely rises and falls with the performance of his beloved New York Mets - told me the other day that people on the news look so unhappy or angry that “they should just call it the ‘bad news hour.’”

He makes a great point. As lawyers, on the professional front alone, we consume huge helpings of bad news every day – from mainstream media coverage of the economic downturn to niche stories on the sorry state of the legal profession and the latest tallies on law firm firings and closures. It can be a real challenge to not get weighed down and stressed out on this steady diet of negativity.

So, I was very heartened to read a great Harvard Business post in which leadership consultant John Baldoni compels us to Find Ways to Make Good News. Baldoni opens by crediting CNN for its coverage of the life and death of Stephen Tyrone Johns, a Holocaust Museum security guard who was shot and killed in the line of duty by a white supremacist. He then asserts that business leaders owe themselves and their “people” a “break from the relentless progress of bad news.” To help them along, Baldoni suggests that they find and share one piece of good news every day. Or, taking it a step further, they can make some good news via their own positive actions.

You’ll find some complementary tips and tools in this New York Times story on Dealing with Recession-Related Stress. If you’re in the Washington, DC Metro Area on June 24-26, my friend and colleague Charlie Badenhop is leading a stress management workshop for coaches, consultants, leaders and other professionals. You can learn more about it here.